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Tuesday, April 27, 2004
I'll give you a deal. Twenty quid.
Twenty quid? You can shove them up your arse. And fuck yourself while you're doing it. For FREE!
He's buying me gifts. Kill me if I get into a serious relationship. Not what he wanted to hear? I like him... I spent most of the day wondering if I am right to close doors rather than leaving them open. Not that I am shutting him out but I'm not going to lie to him. He acted like a wounded animal, like I killed one of his offspring. These days an ole' fashioned tongue war means I am now going to bear you children? Still he is hot and my vagina says differently. I was feeling down man! LOW as we like to say. I scrolled through my phonebook, I was searching for someone neutral... how come I have 40 dudes in my cell phone and 4 chicks... I need a new cell phone. 90% of the 40 are not neutral and the other 5% lie about it except one... I needed to be entertained, morale was l o w. I wanted a safe zone some place where flirting wasn't expected and I don't have to perform, with most people I feel like I have to be funny or entertaining ITS WHAT I AM. I was too tired for that, and my brain was like egg gravy, who likes egg gravy you ask -- NO ONE! See the thing about neutral parties is that THEY DON'T LIKE YOU and if you call them to hang out -- this otherwise safe zone -- is unreachable. People, guys in general, that are not into you tend to put you on a back burner, its a place to be but I NEEDED A PICK ME UP DAMMIT. Just a laugh or two over coffee with someone I see eye to eye with... I settled for a gay friend my pick me up left me in depression over a meeting -- you know that booming night business that is making its way back, it was a very American Psycho excuse, I accepted it. I am supposed to go see Dillon right now, he gets off of work at 3 am... I will explain what we did yesterday tomorrow... that should be my new mantra
GOODBYE ASSHOLES
Twenty quid? You can shove them up your arse. And fuck yourself while you're doing it. For FREE!
He's buying me gifts. Kill me if I get into a serious relationship. Not what he wanted to hear? I like him... I spent most of the day wondering if I am right to close doors rather than leaving them open. Not that I am shutting him out but I'm not going to lie to him. He acted like a wounded animal, like I killed one of his offspring. These days an ole' fashioned tongue war means I am now going to bear you children? Still he is hot and my vagina says differently. I was feeling down man! LOW as we like to say. I scrolled through my phonebook, I was searching for someone neutral... how come I have 40 dudes in my cell phone and 4 chicks... I need a new cell phone. 90% of the 40 are not neutral and the other 5% lie about it except one... I needed to be entertained, morale was l o w. I wanted a safe zone some place where flirting wasn't expected and I don't have to perform, with most people I feel like I have to be funny or entertaining ITS WHAT I AM. I was too tired for that, and my brain was like egg gravy, who likes egg gravy you ask -- NO ONE! See the thing about neutral parties is that THEY DON'T LIKE YOU and if you call them to hang out -- this otherwise safe zone -- is unreachable. People, guys in general, that are not into you tend to put you on a back burner, its a place to be but I NEEDED A PICK ME UP DAMMIT. Just a laugh or two over coffee with someone I see eye to eye with... I settled for a gay friend my pick me up left me in depression over a meeting -- you know that booming night business that is making its way back, it was a very American Psycho excuse, I accepted it. I am supposed to go see Dillon right now, he gets off of work at 3 am... I will explain what we did yesterday tomorrow... that should be my new mantra
GOODBYE ASSHOLES
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